Emma Ratchford who wishes to remain anonymous has confessed in a startling report that she point blank lies to her podgy mates to make them feel shit about themselves.
Mrs Ratchford revealed that she’s been telling ‘Porky Pies’ ever since she was at university after getting a job in a local bistro.
“At Uni I literally had no money to eat so I’d scoff loads of food at work because they fed us for free and wouldn’t eat much during the rest of the week.
All the other waitresses were a bit older and had normal lives so they ate fucking loads all the time and couldn’t understand how I could eat so much and stay so thin”
To keep the illusion of a mega fast and unachievable metabolism Emma would get up early in the morning to go running and train vigorously in her room along with sticking to a strict diet, whilst telling everyone that she does nothing active, is naturally lazy and lives on junk food and chocolate!
“I found it gave me a massive buzz when I saw how shit these people felt about themselves when I ate in front of them and decided to keep up the charade for as long as I could, 20 years on and I’m still going strong”
Mrs Ratchford went on to disclose that there is a huge secret community of ‘Skinny bitches’ all over the world who connect via secret Facebook groups.
“Its brilliant, we share diet and fitness techniques, ways to fit it in the day without getting caught as well as ways to lie to our friends!
We even share pictures of massive burgers and pizzas to post on Facebook with captions like ‘I’m such a fatty’ and ‘Oops not again'”
Emma joined her local gym with two of her tubbier mates earlier this year so they could all ‘get fit’ together.
“It was great, obviously they don’t know that I’ve been secretly training vigorously for the past 20 years, they didn’t stand a chance!
We did a full spin on day 1, 10k run on day 2 and a boot camp on day 3, I was buzzing while they were shattered, pretty sure one of them actually shit herself!”
The Daily Gym Shart 